damn...it's over now..i know i should be happy that nag move-on na siya..but dammit...feeling ko i lost something really special...actually..i KNOW that i lost someone very special...it's my fault i admit...kung hindi dahil sa katangahan ko everything will be great...haaiizz...i am happy now i guess...but i feel that i would have been happier if...fuck...i dont like making choices...amf...i hate the person i am now..i feel like i've turn into a bitch..godhelpme...my mom(tita) will be arriving this saturday...im so excited to see her..but sadly my brother(cousin) will be leaving tomorrow...and i have no idea when will i see him again...will it be 2 years from now or 20 years from now...i have no idea..haai...why am i starting to hate myself?!?shit!is this because of the socalled love or no??!!why is it that i am trully happy only when i talk to the two of them...and as it is soon i would be only able to talk with just one...he didn't allow me to go out with him..i understand his reason why..but..i still feel bad about his decision...
why is it lots of people leave me?i guess it is just the way it is...i should learn to stand alone..but its just so damn hard..i should be an expert with this kind of thing by now with my parents leaving me and etc...i guess i never learn..i should talk to my friends about this...but i feel that..i dont know..laugh at me?ewan...i guess i never really did gave them ung buong trust ko..i gave it to one...but saddly..i am about to lose him..amf..
on a happier note he just texted me now..atleast he still haven't forgotten me.. :)
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